of lights and dogs

Since I bought my house I now there are some things going around which I have deal quite well...for an insane guy. First there were the presence of someone lurking in the room, who even dare to lay down in bed with me. Then there were the firefly like lights...which scare the hell out of me the first time. But lately the dogs are being restless at odd time in the morning, in which moments I feel movement in the outside(hopefully not a stoker). Last night the room light up completely with a wing shape light for about 2 minutes...WTF...or...OMG. Luckily I was not alone so it was not a dream. Ever since I started working on the gardens things are more welcoming...I though I was joking about the druid thingie. I used to be more a tune in a galaxy far away a long time ago...maybe something is coming back or I am coming back.

is it Monday?

No matter how organized I am there are two variables that completely mess up my equations: work and my mother. This weekend I let work cancel out my best friend. I am not proud of it but I think is my nature. I am not going to blame no one because I know ppl. I am just so fucking frustrated that I let her down. Beside being up all night and then receiving calls early in the morning I got so tired that I just needed it a bed and then some Potter.
With half a brain in function I became Dear Abby or something. There seems to be an epidemic of break outs so BEWARE!! D things can and will get better...Al just hang in there it can't rain forever...Busta just thanks...Moe you are an accident waiting to happen...J & A you are so sweet that you make me sick(in a good way) don't change and thanks for a great meal and company.
Clear the air in some personal issues that were over due. Hopefully I can try to enjoy some company or companionship.

Wildfire
Sonata Arctica

Oh, why are we so sad?
Are we feeling hurt by their evil eyes
and all those empty words?
We are thirsty for payback?
What would we like to do with the town?
Would we like to make it... dance? With the Animal?
Would we? WOULD WE?!
Tell us what we would like to do.
... burn it... burn it all...

Burn honey, burn, let the fire eat away
I never liked the look of this town
Burn it down now
I'll run, they all know what I've done
I fetch my gear and take my leave from this mountain

I never had a chance to prove I wasn't guilty,
I always seemed to get blamed for
Every little crime, I didn't even have a name for...

Still running, still defeated in my mind
I never even tried to defend my own pride
The father ain't always like the son
They claim we've purloined, I'm not the one...

The story always goes, when the anger within
Builds up for too long...
Takes us over...
And we all are forced to obey, hey...

It was a match made in Hell,
now the whole mountain burns
and every man gets what no man deserves

Our beloved kin never learned to fit in
Now I pay for my name, live my life in sin
How much less can I ask from you people?
This town stays in disarray
'til the rules are the same for us all, hey...

I've ran on this mountain, with no guilt of my own
The trees and the rocks, every cave, every hole
I dropped them a line, "beware, this mountain will
blow in your face. My last saving grace..."

Bells toll all over the town, burn, burn until it's all gone
Game over, what was a bad joke is now a reality show...

Are we all forced to obey... Are we ALL are forced to obey...

I climbed up the mountain,
and dug a grave for each day of pain,
it's in the past, this moment's so frail...
I am what you made me
With years of abuse, So burn!!!!

This is a match made in Hell,
now the whole mountain burns
and every man gets what no man deserves

Our beloved kin never learned to fit in
Now I pay for my name, live my life in sin
How much less can I ask from you people?
This town stays in disarray
'til the rules are the same for us all

Our beloved kin
Now I pay for my name
How much less can I ask from you people?
I hereby declare a martial law
and you all, we all are forced to obey... hey!

Ups, downs and around

I will try to have a good attitude towards the things I can not change...if I keep repeating that to myself I might start to believe it. But God why do you have to test me so hard? Good intentions are bullshit, posite thought are useless, ACTIONS move the world. Ppl should spend more time doing, making, putting ideas into motion instead of just talking and wasting air. But once again I have to admit that if everyone act like that then I am the one who must be wrong. Wrong of trying to behave like a responsable human being. Wrong of expecting support. Wrong of believing other ppl can have critical thinking. So I will admit I am wrong on putting trust somewhere beside me.
Teaching myself how to take care of plants and having a good time doing it(who knew?). I am finally spending time outside the house :o I think the neighbors are getting worry lol

Friday 13th

This is a well balance week, last Saturday was 7/7/7 and today is Friday 13th. Life is trying to reach a middle point or something...hmmm Since I did not got lucky hopefully I won't get (more) bad luck. The druid/Ranger is in full motion I was able to bring back to life a rose plant and another tree/bush that the gardener buthcer a few months ago. WARNNING: EMOTIONS AHEAD Yesterday I went to water the plants and I saw a little green on the pot that have, what I though was a lost cause, death pices of wood for the past 3 weeks. Thinking it was jsut grass I bend to pick it out. For my surprise they were leaf on the base of the trunk. I look for someone to share the news and the only ones there were the dogs. So I went and share the happy news with them. I was on the floor with four dogs fighting for attention. I also saw improvement on a rose that was deprive of leaf. It took me more than 2 years but I am learning the basic of plant growing...Everything has two sides lol


www.hostdrjack.com

:-O_ _ _ _

Why the Hell did I wait so long to see Pirates of the Caribbean? Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!! The movie is so freaking good. So many things happening my eyes were everywhere. Perfect timing for my so bored existence. The only fault is that I probably won't be able to see it again in the theater...maybe. Please someone bring D&D back to my life...maybe I should >:|
Work irrelevant at the moment trying to keep the I don't care attitude, house same ups and downs, personal life...having one, not the perfect one but one. I need something to focus my energy on even if it is the bad one. If I can not find the lost arc maybe I can find a desolated island in the process.
Liking myself a lot but piss at too many things around me. Full fill, NEVER and I have to deal with that. Perhaps it is my high expectations or the never ending flow of ideas that come to my head. Whatever it is I know for a fact that I will never be satisfied with nothing or no one. At least I will have goals until the day I day or my goals kill me :s

Which Horror Movie Are You?

Ginger Snaps

You are ready to move on with your life and become a whole other person. You are tired of what you used to be, you need to introduce some excitment into your life, however you can. Whether this means taking up a new a job, or a whole new identity, you want to leave who you used to be at the door, and break out of your shell, becoming a whole new person.


Is that a hint or something?? Frustration is beggining to take a tool on me so I will try my best to ignore and keep on walking. I will not try to make things right, if you like to breath shit them for all means stuff yourself. Why should I care if no one does. I will just live and let die.

Friday??

Well the week is over and I am looking forward to spend some quality time in my house alone or with company, wherever the wind blows. Seriously thinking of getting out of the house so I can go on new venues, but not sure yet. I am not sure if it is the time of the year or something else...I will keep track. I can not see where I am going, is like driving while falling asleep, you open your eyes and find yourself farther but you don't know how or when is going to end.
A batch of new faces is hatching lets see if they have the longevity the become more or will they disappear in the mist like distant memories.

Sometimes...

Should I feel rage or pity towards the ppl that can't or are unable to live to my so Godly expectations? I am aware that I do expect allot from the ppl around me, and of course I know that my expectations are unrealistic by mortal standards. But I refuse to lower them...then what are my options?
1.Stop winning because no one can satisfied me
2.Keep crushing souls in the wake of my rage for their stupidity
3.Ignore, Delete, Restart
4.Cease waiting for a Big Bang

I closed myself a long time ago and now I know why. Is not the pain of being hurt is the frustration of being disappointed. I can handle suffering but I am a bitch when it comes down to be let down. The worse part is that only I notice those times, ppl are so single minded or just plain...well plain that they do not even realize something is wrong and when they do catch something is out of place, they tend to point to another direction.

Until September these will be frustrating months...

Yesterday my mother and stepfather celebrated their 28th anniversary, man that is some give and take relationship. But it does work for them. If only dogs lasted that long...

Middle of 07

After a month of no going to the movies I went to see FF Rise of the Silver Surfer...Is Stan Lee so desperate of attention that he is willing to sacrifice quality over a few seconds on screen. I am not a hard core fan of the FF and even I could see the mayor violations done to that story. And lets say for the sake of the argument that I went to see it as just a movie then it just plain sucks!
Besides that I did some cleaning on the garden..not much
House keeping...while it last
Getting tire of being there for everyone, I am about to turn into the Mar's Storms and blow everyone in my path. Not fair to be the One and never have a one. I do not have a problem to be a lone wolf but if you are trying to be part of my pack act like you mean it. Run beside me, hunt with me, sleep under the same fullmoon, cry under the same rain. I only ask for you to share my experiences, my journey, my life.