Friday finally

Thanks God is Friday. What a looong week this has been. I cant wait to get home and sleep for 10 hours straight, no phone, no pager, no boss....I need a break. Going shooping for a new sound today. I love my Nightwish/Sonatartica combo but I think is time to add something new. Had a revelation yesterday I can have a companion, a lover, a best friend the problem is that all 3 dont share the same body...hmmm. I am so simple I confuse myself. My companion is there whenever I need someone to talk about my life, but in the long run the sex start to get boring, monotonous, familiar. My lover is always going to be exciting, refreshing, jolly...but I dont want to go deep and ruing everything. My best friend knows everything about me but I dont want to share a bed with her...There was a time when I though I could get everything in one package now I just settle for little pieces that can complete me. Not bad considering the circunstances.

Weekend??

On Friday I went to see a movie that Vierna had the audacity of calling at 12 am to recommened. The movie "V for vendetta" Oh my f***ing God what a rush. It was poetry in motion it has been a while since the last time I felt so trill in a theater. I was so full of emotions that I even cry during the movie. If you havent seen it go. If you dont get it then your lost, if you do get it call me to share it. On Saturday I went to a surprise thingie my stepfather had for my mom I played dominoes( yes I know) with her for a while. My 2 brothers were there some friends and family. She was happy and wearing the earings I gave her :)
Sunday had to come to the office due to a failure on some backups and the system being dowm. They called me at 8:20 am. I was at the office until 3 pm left everything ok and went home to finish cleaning, which I did. With the house clean I read 2 chapters of LoTR.
Today they called me at 6 am(luckly I was on my way). Someone decided to make a power test in the institution and the HUGE ups we have in the office fail. So I started with no light + no system. At 10 am I got almost everything under control.
I have to take a friend to a surgery on Friday and probably take care of him during the next weekend...ok this better pay off.
On the bright side someone left me a Myrna's Sweet cake on my desk. If I had cold milk I would have eaten the whole thing right now.
Vierna I am far but you just need to call.
Groundel dont get mad but GROW UP and GET A LIFE
Trasher either commit or get the Hell out
Sara(still no name for you) stay strong things are not that bad
Angel we are getting there or out of there
Juanca make up your mind
Angel2 dont put with all the crap
Me start taking action

Hopefully I will have time to rest this weekend. Feeling tired the whole week eventhough I have been gettint 7 to 8 hours of sleep. I had a meeteing at DACO on Monday and the contractor agreed to pay me every week until the full...FULL? amount is cover. I just want to get this experience behind me and forget I ever meet that guy.
I havent been able to get a hold of my friend in Ponce so I supposed the campaing is dead. is not like they were that great anyway, but it was something.
My mom turn 62 last Tuesday. I gave her two pair of handcrafted earings by a viequence. She was happy.
For some reason I am hook to this season of American Idol so goodbye to Chicken Little...you had a bad day.

I shouldnt go to sleep early. I can either sleep 3 or 4 hours or over 9 hours. I went to sleep las night at 10 walked up at 5am and I feel like shit. Anyway is Friday and I dont work on Monday due to another meeting regarding the asshole contractor who owns me money. Maybe it was a dream but I think V called, I will check wih here and my cell later. Havent heard from the guys @ Ponce so maybe that is another dead campaing we will see. Starting to write two stories to see which one will keep my interes long enough. I talk to Juanca this week he left a very good job to go teach in High school, then there is Javi who has been a teacher for 12 years and want to go to the PeaceCorps, also V who is looking for a career change...is good to know I am not the only one going thru a phase.

Weekend of Sequels

Ok so I was bore and my great idea was to rent some movies I havent seen...bad idea. First i took a copy of AD&D2 Wrath of the something Dragon, like the first one was so great the decided to make another. Stupid module, no creative DM, cheap,cheap, cheap effects. Oh! and dont forget too long so you can hate it more. Who at the end of editting said this is a good movie? They should fireball, icestorm and the acid him. Next watch Zatura...I loved jumanji I still enjoy watching the movie I dont care about the animatronics or the so obvious blue screen,the movie was entertaining, witty, sassy and it had mister Williams in it. Zatura well it fell short will be an understatement. The movie is so predictable, yes for a movie base on a random game it is predictable. The actors well they SUCK even the supposed to be adorable kid is annoining. The only good thing about this renting frenzy was The Three Musketers,closest thing to a gaming experience I had in the past 2 month.
I follow a frind advice and started reading my books on the living room. I left it there so I have to sit there to continue reading. Move the baby fishes to the entertaiment room so I have to spend time there watching them swim. C I do follow some advices.

My nose is running again I think I should send it to the Olympics or something. This weekend I did absolublty nothing. Just rented Legend of Zorro.......I should have rentend the first one I watched twice. Is Zorro for God's sake why did the try to make it deep? the world may never know.
Unable to decide about my future, and I mean all parts of it:love, financial, career and the list can go on. I might go to Alaska where I can live with my dogs and be alone.
What is the purpuse of having a house if I only use one room?

This weekend was to my House. I clean the backyard, took out all he weed/dry stuff that was covering it for the past 2 month. Plant some things in it...lets see if my curse does not kill them. I have the mutant ability that kill everything I plant. In Spanish "Mato todo lo que entierro" Clean the whole House including the closets... the allergies are killing me. Took care of my fish tanks...I have a new batch of swords tails(fishes). Between chores I was able to catch Flashdance, Vanhelsing, Return of the King(dont get tired of it) and some episodes of Danny Phantom and fairy old parents.
This week at work same old shit happening
On personal matters the waters are calm. just sailing away where the wind will take me. Not forcing anything, not waiting anything just sailing.

Long week looking forward to the weekend. Enough said.

The Ranger is back!

This weekend when to a "finca" in Yabucoa to gather some plants...A friend told me that he had a few Heliconia(http://www.highlandheliconia.com/) so I went to the country...Nice morning, yes I wake up at 8:00 am on Sunday. With a "machete" in hand I went to get the goods. Brought a few plants to my house some for the backyard, a few to hide the doggies and a few to suck water. Then in my house got started on cleaning the dry land that is my backyard. I work on it until 6 pm and there still a lot of stuff to do. I forgot I had to work today. So it will be until next week to finish the cleaning process then on to the landscapping. Not sure what I will do yet. Need more cactuses for the front yard. Hope the ranger does not go huntting so I can get some work finish there.

The day after V

Hope everyone had a nice V-day. Me...well I went to my house to have a nice evening with my lover the TV. But I have to admit I did had a lot of calls from friends and some ghosts. Plus the sugar rush was great. The best compliment I got in the day was "he can eat all the chocolate we want just look at that body" (blush) it did wonders for my self steem.
Thinking on doing another degree in Psy or Literature. Talk to a few people and the lawer thing might not be great at this stage in my life. But still dont know.
Planning a get away on Holy Week, not a beach resort maybe a quite place on the mountains will be great.

Have you seen the commercial "I work with monkeys"? And the sequel "I work with jackasses"? well that sums up my working experience at the moment.

Wednesday

I feel like that in the middle...to far from Saturday not close enough to monday...I am an Island stranded between two continents. In one there is progress, technology , money in the other hopes, dreams, fear...why cant I have it all. Why do I have to sacrifice one for the other. Why my fricking mind has to be in 2 places at the same time. I enjoy what I do for a living but there is so much more I want to do. I dont want to wait until I am almost 50 to have a life. I have the illusion of one right now and s killing me.
Nothing around me lift my soul
motionless wind around me
leeching my will to go on
just a memory of my own
will the night bring joy
or just another empty promise

Something this small can last a very long time.

Misplaced

Wrong time/era/place that is how I feel but hey I am the eternal Knight protector of all, last one to stand never leaving my post. Too many responsabilities on this shoulders, wish I could be careless like some people and live out of my mother or piety, hey I will even seatle for a lover to pay the rent+food+entertaiment...I would be so lucky if I didnt care but I do. Last time I felt my spirit fly was in a beautiful place call Mayaguez...those times always bring a smile to my face, but nothing last forever but the memories remain.

Dark clouds over my head
constant rain everywhere
sweet kiss of death desire
last breath of love forgoten
shadow path of mirages
dying sun in the horizon
starless night my companion

AQ

another week

Good idea:inviting some friends over....Bad idea:tell your friends to invite friends...I was bore on Saturday so I decided to call some people I know to come to my house...I stopped being bore. I turn into Mama Ines, my feet were killing me, I lost track of people, I had a blast. Sony eat something, Angel show me the way, Ursula hang in there things might get better, JC call me damn it. Hope to see V house before the next century.

New Year

Happy New Year and blah, blah, blah....

NOTHING interesting during my 9 days vacations. I almost rot in my house for 4 days...not that many people care. Decide to end the trip in fairyworld and send the pixie on her married way :P Played Wizardry alot(didnt finished though) Trying to get to Ponce nexx weekend to start the year with the campaing. Hopefully Kymil will be at work and we can communicate more often so I will try to get her on board for the game. This Friday I am finally getting the inspector from DACO at my house so I can try to continue the work that the !##$$@$ didnt finished.
Hunting for a new sound but havent found one that rock my world yet(I am talking about music).
At least I have two of my dogs with me at my house and their puppies(2) which have give me a great satisfaction. I can spend hours on the floor getting lick, trample and cover with hair...love every minute of it. They are turnning to be a nice terapy to get away from everything and get out of my room once in a while.
Well back to my first day of work

Only two more days of work and off to neverland for 2 weeks. I feel so f*&(*^ng tire I just want to sleep and sleep and sleep. Still hate the holydays but have to love the cold mornings and rainy days...I bought a notebook to start writting stuff...maybe I still have it, not sure, but I am going to find out.
Calling V all week but not luck...hint, hint, hint...
Saw a low budget film call Forbidden Warrior is a refrshing movie, nothing to write home about it but if you are bore(as I was) is an OK movie about a choosen one(not Neo) who must learn about her destiny.
Since these next weekneds are Holydays have to call my party at Ponce to see if they want/can play if not I will visit some friends that I havnet seen in quite a while..hint, hint, hint...

Is that time of the year that make me want to crawl under a rock and stay there until the rotting stench of my flesh wakes me up. Is the time to share the joy with the family that I dont have beside my mother and father. They are the only ones I consider relatives so instead of feeling all warm inside all I can do is think what will happen when they are not there?..who will care when they are no longer beside me? loneliness is a beautiful sensation except when it start to eat you from the inside out. I was born to feel alone, to never have the satisfaction of knowing completness, to know there is something missing but never being able to find it.


Misplaced
Sonata Artica

(Tony Kakko)

Sometimes I feel so out of time and place, trapped in a maze
As if I was lost in someone else's life...
The values I should keep in high regard don't mean a thing to me

Do you ever feel a need to go back in time? A dream of mine...
To travel far away and one day steal back my life
In the end all I can do is to learn I live in a dreamland

This time was not made for me,
I have nowhere to land, no place to rest,
Like a bird, without a nest, I'm gliding
Under the clouds, forevermore

How much suffocated anxiety can be held within?
I was found guilty to a crime against myself.
No need to hear the words again,
I live and I'd die for my dreamland

This time was not made for me,
I have nowhere to land, no place to rest,
Like a bird, without a nest, I'm gliding
Under the clouds, forevermore

I'll never have a chance, I can't understand
I'm a misplaced man
How could this backward land
Learn to understand my dance
What it's like, when every single smile hurts...

I have never felt like home here
Always missing something
People aren't connecting
Am I a misplaced soul?

I live in a perfect Hell, I try finding my wishing well
when I drop my last tear, I have accepted this life

A true saint, that I am not, you have never seen me
'Cause I have always been there, standing by your side

I'll never have a chance, I can't understand
I'm a misplaced man
How could this backward land
Learn to understand my dance
what it's like, when

Every single moment pains me...
Never felt like home here
I am missing something
My soul's in a wrong shell





Yes I am this crazy after all the crap I took a Nerd test

0ne Month Later

Quick status:
--House: the same, the contractor is missing in action I only wish that whatever happen to him I can be there to see it. Did som Xmas decoration.
--Work: Completely piss at it. Nothing is fair and my search for a new job is great if they pay what I want, but apparently everyone want to be cheap assholes
--Relationship:...Still having fun, not thinking about it too much, getting by

I am very disappointed with the house or maybe with the whole situation. I love to be on my own and enjoying the privacy + freedom. But the troubles with the contractor had left a bad taste that is being very hard to get out of my mouth. I havent bought a thing for the house in like 3 months and I havent done the garden in 2 month. I think the neibors believe I am a pig...who cares. Hopefully I will be out of comission fron december 23 until january 9..I know is only two weeks but that is 7 days more than I usually have. My big plan is to sleep, sleep and read. I have no plan on doing to much. Game in Ponce is going ok I have another player so back to the drawing board to get him into the campaing...waitting for Kymil to make a special apearance(maybe). On the plus side the weather upthere is great for staing in bed under the blankets...alone ppl dont be naugty. My bitch gave birth to 5 puppies but 2 have already left us. One of the puppies is pure white...I CANT HAVE MORE DOGS!!!! keep saying that to me whenever I mention herbeauty.

1/2

Would you dare to live half a lie to get half a life? would you deceive enough to get by feeling alive? Would you tell someone the glass is half full when it was you who drank the half that is missing? I am playing a game, dont know how far I will go but for now I feel alive for a few minutes a day. I can scape from the routine of daily life and transport myself to a cloud of no worries. Where I dont even consider the fall. And if I can take someone with me in that journey...where is the damage. Let us fly until the song ends.

On other more normal thingies...I went to Ponce on Sunday had a blast. We played for almost 7 hours straight. We didnt even break to eat. The fighter is making lots of progress in the roleplaying area. The Priest I will make into something usefull. The mage will break or break no second guessing now. And the newest member, the Thief, looks like the leader of the pack. There were twist, turns and of course the old "how did you felt for that". Over all it was a great experience hopefully V and S will be able to be part of it. I found my first D&D notebook...damn I had a lot of spare time.

I am leaving P.R. for 4 days. Going on Friday be back on Monday. In case anyone try to call...DONT.

Happy Halloween

For me Halloween is what Xmas is for almost everybody. I get more satisfation looking at spider's web, haunted houses, skeletons and the like than I get from epileptic lights and fat snow men dress in red. Because this night like myself can go either way...you could go trick ot treating the whole night or you can look for a nice groove and do rituals...I am not saying I have(but wont denied it either. So for all the outcast out there Thanks for mot making me the only one


Masquerade, masquerade
Grab your mask and don't be late
Get out get out well disguised
Heat and fever in the air tonight
Meet the others at the store,
Knock on other people's door
Trick or treat they have the choice,
Little ghosts are makin' lotsa noise
But watch out. . .beware--listen. . .take care

In the streets on Halloween
There's something going on
No way to escape the power unknown
In the streets on Halloween
The spirits will arise
Make your choice, it's hell or paradise
Ah--it's Halloween
Ah--it's Halloween. . .tonight!

Someone's sitting in a field,
Never giving yield
Sitting there with gleaming eyes,
Waiting for big pumpkin to arise
Bad luck if you get a stone,
Like the good old Charlie Brown
You think Linus could be right
The kids will say it's just a stupid lie

But watch out. . .beware--listen. . .take care
In the streets on Halloween
There's something going on
No way to escape the power unknown
In the streets on Halloween
The spirits will arise
Make your choice, it's hell or paradise
Ah--it's Halloween
Ah--it's Halloween. . .tonight

Listen now--we are calling you. . .
And there is magic in the air
Magic in the air. . .
on Halloween

Black is the night full of fright
You'll be missing the day
What will be here very soon
Changing your way
a knock at your door
Is it real or is it a dream
On trembling legs you open the door
And you scream. . . .on Halloween

Darkness
Where am I now
Is there anybody out there
What has happened
Am I in heaven
Or is it hell
I can see a light comin'
It's comin' nearer
It's shining
It's shining so bright
It's shining on me

I am the one, doom's in my hands
Now make your choice,
Redeemed or enslaved

I'll show you passion and glory
He is the snake
I'll give you power and abundance
He's the corrupter of man

Save me from the evil one
Give me strength to carry on
I will fight for all mankind's
Deliverance and peace of mind

But watch out. . .beware--listen. . .take care
In the streets on Halloween
There's something going on
No way to escape the power unknown
In the streets on Halloween
The spirits will arise
Make your choice, it's hell or paradise

Ah--it's HalloweenAh--it's Halloween. . .tonight